Updated: Mar 5
Wait! Someone out there has compiled a list of 10 tips that will make us happy?
Like check off each item and, BAM, there you have it- you’re now officially happy?
I mean, I love a good list and all, however this seems a-little-too-broad.
For starters, we are all so similar as humans, yet so individually unique. Never would I ever expect that the things that make you happy are the same things that make me happy.
Some people love dogs licking their faces. Nooot this girl; keep it to yourself, pup!
Some people are happy eating octopus legs - Yep, I’ve seen it before. That guy was in heaven!!! Gives me the heebeegeebees in my tummy - different strokes for different folks, right?
A Few of My Favourite Things...
There are many things that bring happiness to me; to my day. Some seem trivial and others perhaps a bit deeper, but that’s the thing - happiness ingredients are unique to each of us.
Is it finding a pair of stellar shoes for a screamin’ deal, (in my size)! Damn straight! Swimming? Yepper! Am I happy when all the stars align and I see wild animals livin’ their best life on my family’s farm? Bald eagles, sleeping foxes and the teeny tiny baby cows kickin’ up their heels at dusk!? YUSSS!
For me that is raw and pure realness, and I always feel completely blessed to be in the right place at the right time to witness it. A delightful surprise every time which follows me through my day.
Those are some of the ingredients to my happiness.
For others that I know, it’s greeting the day with 3 focused, cleansing breaths before even opening his eyes and hugging at least 1 tree each day. My cousin loves to swing at the playground. Said cousin is 41, and this is her happiness. I mean, what’s yours; do you know?
We Stumble ~ We Don’t Have to Crumble...
Am I happy when my flight home is cancelled and I’m not sure when I’ll get back because of Covid tests and limited seats? Mmmm, I’m definitely not jumping for joy in these moments. Am I happy when my mom is diagnosed with a brain tumor on Christmas eve? No joke; that happened. It definitely made me take pause and reflect; and I can honestly say that I felt disappointment, sadness and some fear to begin with.
I even ugly cried on a Zoom call in the midst of not knowing some decisions to make during that new diagnosis, but did it shake my legit happiness? No. Within those emotions and events, I did not lose my happiness. #1 because I did not STAY in those emotions. I allowed them the space they requested and let them move on when it was time.
And, #2 because for me, my happiness is not conditional on outside circumstances. It can’t be; otherwise, we’d crumble at every ‘hiccup’ that appears on our paths. Canceled flights, cancer, heartbreaks, messy misunderstandings with family members are all parts of this colourful, sometimes complicated thing called life.
I have chosen happiness and she stays with me.
Choice is in Your Control...
Many of the examples I gave are outside of us and outside of our control. Most everything is, isn’t it? Yet, my happiness is not dependent on them.
The control I did have in those moments was through my choices.
I knew that I could decide HOW I would face those challenges. Either absorb the frustrations, disappointments and fears by stuffing food in my mouth; down to my gut, or I could keep the spaciousness in my body and feel the emotions which allows healing, ideas and necessary solutions to arrive.
By NOT choosing food in those moments was how I allowed the feelings the space they needed and then they could move on in freedom.
I AM Happiest When I Feel Good...
With space comes lightness, and a type of magic that you otherwise numb out by stuffing it down. To honour my feel-good means that I need to honour myself and make the choice(s) that allow for that.
I’m not saying frustrations and disappointments feel good, or that it is easy to face them. I am saying that choosing to feel our emotions rather than covering them is always a choice.
At the very least, not feeling heavy and burdened by food meant that I was free to face everything else as my authentic self - the best version of me. Often it means choosing to cry rather than choosing the food, because ultimately, that choice is the feel-good.
That choice is the medicine.
At the end of the day, I can greet the night embracing my happy, knowing that I honoured my feel-good.
Knowing yourself and getting clear on what is happiness for you, means you can take it with you in all you do. You can draw on those moments, memories and experiences and fill yourself up again when needed. Remember, it is in you.
For me I know that I am happiest when my body feels rested, nurtured and light. It’s like my basic foundation.
For example, the foundational pieces on my ‘Things that make Colleenie Happy’ List are: A ridiculous amount of quality sleep. A slow morning with meditation, (please don’t rush me). A fab cup of coffee, (at least, that’s what my brain says, although, my body often says tea). So definitely honouring my gut’s requests is a huge focus for me. This also means spaciousness in my stomach. I feel most aligned when I’ve eaten enough to gently satisfy my hunger.
Simply put, not overeating!
Do I always make the most aligned choices? Bah! No, of course not! I’m human, Love - not perfect.
I do love knowing that there is knowledge in the contrast though. There are always learning oppurtunities, so with that, do failures really exist?
Trust that there will be many opportunities to choose differently. I like to see it as a game and it can be quite fun.
'I Call DOO-OVEEER!!!'
List Your Priorities, Babe...
Ok, so, yes, I do agree that a list of ingredients that make you happy can lead you to happiness, in the sense that it brings you closer to you... To knowing yourself. Which massively influences what you prioritize in your day, in your life.
I encourage you to make the list; make it YOUR list and rock it out on the daily.
Grab a pen(cil) and paper and write it out. Get clear on the ‘things’ that bring smiles and joy to you; that make you feel most in alignment with yourself and make these your unshakeable norms.
I even suggest getting clear on the things you don’t enjoy and see what shifts you can make around those.
Please, prioritize your feel-good, because when you feel good, you do good and when you thrive, we all thrive!
'When you take care of yourself, you are the gift that keeps on giving.' (Kiki A.)
A dear friend once told me that he decided at a very young age ‘to make happiness his best friend.’ How fantastic is that?! Your best friend! You always have each other's back!
Find your happy and choose it, Darling. Hold it’s hand and take it with you.
Until next time, Starseeds.
~ C. xx